Are You An Asian Man Trying To Navigate The Challenging World Of Dating In 2022?
If you’re like most Asian cisgender heterosexual men, you’re probably searching for answers on how to be more successful at dating beautiful women of any race.
The cold, hard truth is this: The world of dating has CHANGED in 2022 and it’s become a lot more complex with the influx of new dating apps, pandemic induced social isolation, cancel culture, changing Gen Z courtship rituals and the growing (rightful) awareness on the importance of consent.
So even though it’s now a tougher dating world for (some) Asian men, since you’re on this blog, let me give you a hearty, and unironic, congratulations! You’re one of the very few men in this world who wants to be a better man in order to be more confident and successful at dating women of all races: Asian, black, white, and Latinas.
You recognize that the future love of your life could be right around the corner and come from any cultural background. And you don’t want to settle for an unhappy relationship with a woman you’re not truly attracted to, like some people.
This is the Ultimate Guide to Dating For Asian Men where you’ll learn essential topics like:
- How to approach beautiful women
- How to talk to her
- How to build attraction with her
- How to gain her consent
- How to date the woman (or women) of your dreams
- And much, much more
Consider this your one stop shopping and library for all things dating, love, and relationship related for Asian men. And I’ll do this by equipping you with the right positive mindset and practical psychological techniques that will improve your confidence and ability to attract, date, and even seduce women of all races.
The Challenges Asian Men Face In Dating:
We first have to realistically appraise that Asian-American men face a lot more dating challenges than your typical cisgender heterosexual Caucasian male. There’s the the continued sexualized racism, growing interracial dating disparity and shocking rise of Covid blaming hate crimes just to name a few.
To put it bluntly, Asian males are seen as the least desirable men out of all the races in America. In one study, women collectively were 60% less likely to respond positively to Asian men than males of their own race (even Asian women too).
Basically, we Asian men are staring down an ever growing dating shit sandwich.
And even though Asian men on average earn 117% of what White men earned, we also can’t simply depend on out-earning other men to gain an advantage in the dating world. If you lead with your wallet, it’s harder to impress her with your personality. It’s better to show her your personality and then, if you so choose, reveal your worldly accomplishments.
On a macro level, the mainstream media and Hollywood bombards society with it’s insidious racist message: how we’re nerdy, asexual, effeminate, weak, and speak broken English. Other times it’s much more subtle. Like how movies never assign lead roles to Asian men but instead, put them as the nerd burying his head in a math textbook.
Many Asian-American men also experience discrimination in real life on a regular basis from physical microaggressions to being called racist slurs. And when COVID broke out, discrimination towards Asians went to a whole new level. There were venues that literally denied my coach and Asian students because they feared we Asians were disease carriers. Many Asian-Americans are being physically attacked and hate crimed just for being Asian.
I myself have literally been attacked on the street at least twice for being Asian.
So it’s understandable that if you’re like most Asian men, then your confidence at achieving high romantic success with the beautiful girl of your dreams is at an all time low. Because chances are the mainstream media like Hollywood and media are trying to beat you down.
But the worst of it is women are being socially conditioned to view Asian males as unworthy of love and will reject Asian men at alarming rates. More specifically, 90% of non-Asian women excluded Asian men when asked about their racial preferences.
And it’s not only white, black, and Latin women who are rejecting Asian men. Asian women are also self-discriminating as well. And that’s because both emasculation and fetishization are two sides of the same coin: with Asian men ridiculed as subhuman on one and Asian women are fetishized as sex objects on the other.
Unfortunately, this has metastasized to an ever growing problem where many (not all but many) Asian women not only refuse to date their own race, but will actively seek to throw the Asian community under the bus in doing so. In fact, 40% of Asian women stated they would not date an Asian man, as opposed to 10% of Asian men or less, stating they would not date an Asian woman.
Let’s not go into online dating because that is a whole other topic where Asian men have almost NO success. The uphill battle for online dating supremacy and success for Asian men is a herculean battle that will be a topic for another article. It’s one I’ve been able to solve to some degree, but it took no small feat of genius social engineering to do so.
And while it seems like us Asian men face a bleak dating apocalypse, there is hope because even though Asian men face an almost existential threat to our social and romantic experience, the course of your dating destiny is about to change.
And that’s because I was voted USA’s #1 Asian Dating Coach™ multiple years in a row: I’ve helped thousands of men and I will not rest until I’ve helped YOU.
Understanding Asian Stereotypes:
Now in order to be successful at interracial relationships, you’re going to need to know how society stereotypes Asian men and where you might fall on that spectrum in the eyes of American women. And that’s because by understanding them, you can hope to begin to deconstruct those stereotypes.
Trigger warning if you’re an Asian guy, here are some common stereotypes that the media has created about Asian males:
- We’re shorter than Caucasian and African American men
- We have a smaller penis (and thus are also poor lovers)
- We’re portrayed as both weak losers AND as misogynistic Yellow Peril villains
- Asian men are “forever foreigners”: Unable to speak English or have a very thick Asian accent or that we all look like
- Lack of confidence and romantic experience with women
- Asians are the nerdy “model minority”
This is by no means an exhaustive list, but it’s the most common and has unfortunately helped contribute to leaving Asian men to be twice as likely to be single than Asian women (35% vs 18%).
How to Succeed with Women as an Asian Man:
Now it might seem that the fight against anti-Asian racism is an ongoing intergenerational fight both within our own Asian community and society at large. But I what I hope to arm you with are the tools you need to attract and date women so that YOU can be happy in the here and now.
We can fight the good fight to shape the world in a better image for our grandchildren while simultaneously having both sexual escapades (if that’s what you want) and finding love (if that’s what you want) in the immediate now instead of delaying gratification for some uncertain future.
And there are going to be multiple pillars of self-improvement that Asian men will have to build upon in order to find an interracial relationship, love, or just general dating success. You will have to deconstruct the internalized racism (and even misogyny) that exists in your mindset. You will have to embark upon physical self-improvement ranging from your body language to fashion and fitness. And you’ll need to learn the art of flirtatious conversation.
We call this Holistic Dating which is a combination of healthy self-improvement combined with practical psychological techniques so you get both long term and short term results instantly. All you need are the right tools. And a coach guiding you in the right direction, holding you accountable, so you can break through the biggest barriers that hold Asian males back from being able to date successfully.
Attraction is both an ingrained biological imperative as well as a form of social conditioning. There are certain primal aspects of masculinity that women are going to be universally attracted to in a man regardless of her race or yours.
But there’s also how society conditions women to view certain male aesthetics to be more appealing than others. You can see this in the Western male aesthetic versus the East Asian male aesthetic, the rise of Kpop male sexual identity, and the American backlash against alternative forms of non-white masculinity.
And while I wish I was born tall, dark and handsome, I’ve learned to settle for being short, stunning and smooth. It is entirely possible to build attraction in women by visually and physically stimulating her while at the same time verbally engaging her on a mental and verbal level.
Perhaps the biggest lesson to be learned about dating in 2022 is that there is a difference between the Male Gaze versus the Female Gaze. While the male gaze focuses on the object (ie distinct body parts), the female gazes focuses on the subject (ie the person as a whole).
And by understanding that, you will better be able to attract and seduce women when you can understand them better. As your Asian Dating Coach, my goal is to help you better at attracting women regardless of what you look like.
We will link out to our Attracting Women Ultimate Pillar Post once it’s written.
Talking to Women:
Your typical cisgender heterosexual white male takes for granted the coveted ability to talk to women with ease. This especially does NOT hold true for ESL (English Is A Second Language) Asian men.
When 28% of Asian-American men do not speak English proficiently, where talking can not only be difficult, then it becomes acutely more embarrassing when trying to flirt with a non-Asian woman because in the back of your mind, you might be thinking she’s going to mock your FOB (Fresh Off the Boat) accent.
Mainstream dating culture never acknowledges the difficulty for men of color in talking to women and the Asian American community discourse primarily focuses on the American born Asian experience and not the recent immigrants or international students/businessmen who don’t have native English speaking proficiency.
Which is just another potentially closed of avenue of building attraction with women, that is if I personally hadn’t figured out how to circumvent that obstacle and taught literally thousands of Asian FOBs how to approach, talk to, attract and date Mid-Western “All-American” Girls even if they can barely speak English.
Here’s what white American dating culture takes for granted when talking to girls that Asians can’t:
- You have to have the ability to talk to women in order to approach her in the first place
- You have to be able hold down and continue a conversation with a non-Asian woman who only speaks English
- You have to create attraction through your story telling and form a deeper emotional connection
- All the while you’re trying to be flirtatious and convey sexual, romantic innuendo in a language not your own
So this is another potentially closed off avenue of building attraction with women, that is if I personally hadn’t already figured out how to circumvent that obstacle and taught literally thousands of Asian FOBs how to approach, talk to, attract and date Mid-Western “All-American” Girls even if they can barely speak English.
As your Asian Dating Coach, I will help you talk to women regardless of whether or not you speak perfect English or an Asian accent.
We will link out to our Talking to Women Ultimate Pillar Post once it’s written.
Dating Women With Success as an Asian Man:
The unfortunate reality is the average Asian guy faces an intimidating array of dating challenges to tackle. And then combine that with many women have been socially conditioned to not even consider dating an Asian guy as a long term option even if he HAD the courage and confidence to ask her out.
Just to give you an idea, women of all races were 33% less likely to want to see an Asian man again.
Ouch! And it’s even harder for Asian males to do online dating.
Successfully dating women as an Asian dude will be a multi-discipline process of both self-improvement but also understanding how dating standards for Western, American girls is different from both Asian American women, but also how it’s cultural different from the Asian motherland.
You’ll need to upgrade your Dating O.S. to the more modern 2.0 version as dating interracially isn’t the same as your father and mother’s time.
We not only have to learn the techniques, like what to say to a woman to get her attracted to you. Or how to meet women etc. But we have to form a common cultural understanding of our different love languages and dating etiquette.
But here’s the thing. If I can do it… If the thousands of students I’ve taught can do it, then so can you. There’s a reason I was voted the #1 Dating Coach for Asian men.
I’ve taught Asian male dating strategies for over a decade now with great success. I’ve been interviewed TV shows. I’ve spoken at Ivy League universities. And I’ve helped Asian men not only achieve short term sexual success, but also long term romances and even successful marriages where my clients are now starting beautiful families.
I won’t say I’ve done it all. Instead, I’ll let my results do the talking. Ask any of my students and they’ll tell you I transformed their dating life. I gave them all the tools and made sure they applied it on a consistent basis, so that they could have the dating life they always desired.
They now have the power to attract a gorgeous woman of any race and cultural background. Anywhere. But anytime. On the street. In a bookshop. In a bar. And some have even started online dating and gotten very proficient at it. And many of my students have gotten married to these incredible women, while their friends remain stuck in toxic or unsatisfying relationships.
Now my students have this skill for life. Meaning even if he does breakup with a woman, he can just go back out there and apply what I taught him. He doesn’t have to go through year long dry spells bereft of love and companionship. He’s been taught how to fish for a lifetime.
This is a far cry for most men who have no choice but to settle for someone they don’t really like because they don’t possess the skills to attract women like my students do. Most men have no idea what really attracts women or how to talk to girls.
Society has taught Asian men to objectify themselves that their only worth as a male is what’s in his wallet, or how tall he is, or how much muscles he has.
Instead as your Asian Dating Coach, I’m going to teach you how to be successful, confident and happy BECAUSE you’re an Asian man and not in SPITE of being Asian.
Link out to our How to Date Women Ultimate Pillar Post once it’s written.
Learn From The Asian Dating Coach™:
Before you invest in a dating coach you want to make sure that this will be the best investment of your life. Check out our handy, easy to use infographic, “5 Things To Look For When Hiring An Asian Dating Coach.”
And after you’ve screened through your choices for dating education, I hope you realize that with me as your Asian Dating Coach, you won’t just be learning techniques and tricks.
You’ll have your entire belief system programmed so that when you apply certain conversation openers or anything like that, it will be as natural as if white male does and maybe even MORE POWERFUL than him.
Women will be ‘wowed’ by your approach because you understand how to break through her heuristics. You’ll open up a new sexual awakening in her based on your pure sex appeal of being an amazing Asian man.
You’ll know exactly how to deal with sexualized racism when it rears it’s ugly head. You’ll know how to not only embrace your Asian identity, but also how to use your Asian culture, history, food, language, and religion to BUILD ATTRACTION with women.
NEVER BE ASHAMED OF BEING AN ASIAN MAN EVER AGAIN.
And during my live training, in person bootcamp, there will be no nonsense. Unlike so many dating coaches out there who only teach the theoretical side like corny pick-up lines, you’ll be actually doing the approaches. You’ll be approaching women in bars, on the street or really anywhere. And you’ll be doing this both in the daytime and the evening.
You’ll be having me and my exclusively picked dating coaches looking over your shoulder and providing you with critical, and brutally honest, feedback. Telling you what you’re doing well. Telling you what you could improve on. Telling you what you did wrong with sugarcoating it with white lies to “protect your feelings.”
And with each approach, you’ll get better and better.
With each woman you talk, you’ll gain more power over your life.
My coaches and I take our students very seriously and we’re not here to tell you what you want to hear. We’re here to give it to you straight.
We’re here to help you improve. We’re here to help you destroy all your limiting beliefs that are holding you back from attracting not only Asian women, but also all non-Asian women in the world no matter her race or cultural background.
Most importantly, we’re here to make you get a return on your investment 10-fold, and help you attract, date and even marry the woman of your dreams.
At least 10% of Asian men want to exclusively date outside of their race compared to the 40% of Asian women who exclusively prefer non-Asian men.
And that might seem a challenging obstacle to hurdle when white women rated Asian men 12% less attractive than white men while Asian women rated white men as 16% more attractive than average.
But every Asian man in the world should feel WORTHY and EMPOWERED enough to date ANY woman he wants regardless of race, height, looks and money.
And as the World’s Best Asian Dating Coach, you’ll be in good hands if you take action today.