Many Asian-American men don’t even consider dating outside their race because we’re taught to only date Asian women, so it never even occurs to us that Asian men can date white women (AMWF), much less should we. Or even if an Asian guy thinks about getting a white girlfriend, Hollywood and the mainstream media perpetuates stereotypes that White women are racist against Asian men so why should you even try if she’s going to auto-reject you anyways?
And that’s because many Asian-American males come from traditional households where our parents only want us to date within our race. A lot of times we have more conservative cultural and sexual standards. But a large contributing factor limiting Asian men’s dating options are limiting beliefs. Limiting beliefs that hold us back from dating outside our race like a beautiful Black woman or talking to an incredible Latina girl.
So this internal lack of dating knowledge like how to approach and have a conversation with a woman combined with internal limiting beliefs and external stereotypes against us, makes it difficult for Asian men to date white women (or any non-Asian women for that matter) in the first place. But there is a solution to how an average Asian guy can go about getting a white girlfriend, if he so chooses.
Challenges Facing Asian Males Dating White Females (AMWF)
Unfortunately, all the media has done is emasculate Asian-American men. We’re portrayed as weak, effeminate, nerdy and every negative trait you can think of. And it’s everywhere. In fact, turn on your TV now and at some point, you’ll find discrimination against Asian men.
And it’s not only on TV. Asian men face discrimination in real life as well. During the breakout of COVID, the number of hate crimes and attacks towards Asians skyrocketed. So a new stereotype against Asians was invented, that we’re disease carriers.
So understandably, with all this negative feedback from society at large telling Asian men that we are not equal to other men or even human, creates a sense of social inferiority called internalized racism. And that’s the main reason why you don’t often see Asian men dating White women. Many Asian men feel unworthy of dating non-Asian women in general (or just blind to the opportunity of interracial dating).
In fact, people in our own Asian-American will actively reinforce internalized racism and that Asian men are not equals. In fact, 54% of American born Asian women will intermarry someone of a different race which is simply astronomical on a sociological scale. The message society is sending is that it’s “better” to marry anyone else OTHER than an Asian man.
Dating in 2022 is a shit sandwich in terms of sexualized racism and the advent of social distancing and dating apps, but it is solvable. But I’m going to show you how you can defeat the racial hierarchy in society. That there are Latinas, Black, and White women for Asian men who can be shown that you are the superior option for a boyfriend, romantic partner and even husband and father.
Asian Masculinity: A Threat To White Supremacist Through The Ages
If you’re like most Asian-Americans, you’ve probably struggled with the concept of your Asian masculinity and sexual identity. We don’t have a lot of role models and what little we have is either negative or limited in scope.
So it’s no surprise that a lot of Asian men will embrace the Eurocentric standard of male beauty in order look more masculine. I’ve seen Asian men get tattoos all over their bodies. I’ve seen many take steroids to get bigger and look more intimidating. I’ve seen many dye their hair blonde and wear blue contacts. Or put down Asian women in order to make themselves feel better.
To be clear, I firmly believe that you can interracially date without parting down your Asian identity, unfortunately internalized racism on the part of both Asian women and men mean that many will throw their own Asian community under the bus in order to “gain points” with White supremacists. I’ve seen all sorts of things Asian men do to conform to a certain standard of masculinity that usually revolves around whiteness. Don’t be that kind of Asian person.
But here’s something Asian men might not know about. Believe it or not, White men used to feel insecure over Asian men and our masculine dominance.
Yes, you read that right. See, in the 19th Century, Chinese railroad workers were both valued and devalued as a man (During and even after the construction of the transcontinental railroad area). Chinese men were expected to earn less while working more. And during that time, the White fear of Chinese masculinity increased (Even though the economic value of Chinese masculinity actually decreased).
To the point where Nevada, in 1861, the White supremacists had to make the first anti-miscegenation laws to prevent Chinese men from marrying white women. They couldn’t stop us Asian men any other way, so they had to cheat. It was only until the court case of Loving v Virginia in 1967 (a full century later!) that interracial marriages between Chinese men and white women finally became legal.
That’s how big of a threat Asian masculinity was to the toxic White masculinity. The Asian man is a direct threat to White supremacists. And they’ve done everything they can to emasculate Asian males. And though the laws have changed, the media is the biggest enforcer of white supremacy stopping Asian men from seeking white women as girlfriends and wives.
In fact, did you know America’s FIRST sex symbol was Japanese actor, Sessue Hayakawa? He was a matinee idol during the age of silent films when he starred in The Cheat and become the sexual archetype of the “forbidden lover.” Distinguished, accomplished, dominant, dangerous, and (yes it was a sign of the times) “exotic”, Sessue Hayakawa exuded such sexual charm that women were known to literally swoon during his movies.
Unfortunately, anti-Japanese racism would eventually strike against this movie star with the Production Code of 1930 enforcing the anti-miscegenation laws which forbade the poor eyes of Caucasian folks from seeing an Asian man seduce a White woman. Like I said, White supremacists have to cheat against Asian men to stop us from seducing “their” White women.
Hollywood will label Asian-Americans as villians, lacking confidence, effeminate and anything associated with being weak. They use all the marketing tactics they can to brainwash everyone with propaganda when legal machinations no longer work. They even exaggerate how weak Asian men are in movies. And unfortunately most people, even in our Asian-American community, are brainwashed. So brainwashed where they discriminate against Asian men without even realizing they’re doing it.
But look I don’t want this to discourage you. I’ve faced a ton of discrimination for being a short, average looking, Asian male. My coaches have been through the same thing and so have most of my students who are Asian men seeking White women. And we all managed to tackle those challenges and beat them into submission. We’re all achieved success with women most guys could only dream of.
And so can you.
Asian Men, Broaden Your Horizons By Dating White Women
If you’re like most Asian men, this might just very well be the first time you actually thought of dating a White woman. I get it, it’s a mental obstacle you have to hurdle. You may have never even seen an Asian male dating a White female. Chances are also good that you might have faced sexualized racism where White women have flat-out told you “I don’t date Asian men.” Or “I don’t like Asian men.”
It sucks, trust me, I’ve heard those racist insults myself. And I’ll get students all the time tell me: “I would love to date a White woman. But they won’t like me because I’m Asian so I’ll stick to dating Asian women only.” If you reject them first, then they can’t reject you to begin with.
So you’d think dating within your own race would be easier for many reasons. You’ll probably have similar background, culture, history, identity, food, language and more. There barriers to communication are a lot lower. And generally speaking, lifestyles and viewpoints are quite similar. And we have so much in common with one another.
However, I have to encourage YOU, and all my students, to date outside your race at least once. Regardless of their racial preferences.
Because it’s just math. Pure, simple, crushing, and inevitable demographic, sociological math.
The racial hierarchy of America means there’s an ever widening interracial gender gap between Asian men and women that’s not going to narrow within your generation (and probably won’t even in your children’s time). If you don’t go with the default option of keeping your dating options racially open, like Asian women do and White men do, you’re going to get pushed out of the dating pool.
Just look at the infographic. Any demographic calculator will tell you that if you’re a hetereosexual male looking for a regular single female:
- For Asian men seeking Asian women, you have a less than 1% chance of finding a girlfriend.
- For Asian men seeking Black women, you have an almost 2% chance of finding a girlfriend.
- For Asian men seeking Hispanic women, you have less than 3% of finding a girlfriend.
- For Asian men seeking White women, you have a less than 10% chance of finding a girlfriend.
- But if you are willing to look for ALL women of ALL races, now you have a whopping 15.75% chance of finding a girlfriend!
- That’s an over 1500% increase of YOU finding a romantic partner and maybe even wife!
If you avoid stereotyping other women and give everyone a fair chance, then when you do date outside your race (for the sake of this article Asian men and White women dating), so many positive things happen. You’ll become more open minded. You’ll discover other dating options. Dating options you would’ve missed if you only stuck to dating girls of the same race.
And because you’ll discover more dating options, you’ll develop an abundance mindset with women.
Many Asian men date White women even without the help of an Asian Dating Coach™. But read on if you want to learn the foolproof way of overcoming the dating racial hierarchy to achieve an AMWF romantic relationship .
How To Date White Women As An Asian Man
Now hopefully you understand that you CAN and that you SHOULD expand your romantic relationship options beyond your own race. Your next question is likely, “Well JT, How do I go about it?” There are two important principles I teach all my students in order to be successful BECAUSE they’re Asian men and NOT in spite of being Asian.
1) You Are The Main Character: Embracing The Asian Male Sexual Archetype
Women’s sexual awakenings is, in a large part, affected by societal conditioning and what society teaches her is attractive and the kind of romantic relationships she is suppose to form. For most young White girls in America, she’ll be exposed to Eurocentric standards of male beauty of which none of us Asian-American men embody.
Yet Hollywood’s first sex symbol was Japanese man Sessue Hayakawa before racist anti-miscegenation laws struck him down for daring to seduce White women. That just shows you that sexual attraction can be created with sheer, raw, Asian male charisma despite societal conditioning.
If an Asian man was the first Hollywood sex symbol who seduce White women in Hollywood, then YOU too can tap into that primal power as well. What worked once before, can work today again.
So you have to think of yourself as the main character of your own story. That you have that Big Dick Energy. Think of what kind of sexual identity do you embody? What’s your Asian Male Sexual Archetype? And there are so many other ways for Asian men to express our male identity that don’t have to include the concept of “trying to be white.”
- Do you want to be a suited up gentleman like Sessue Hayaka?
- Or a Kpop idol / Kdrama actor?
- Maybe the metrosexual dandy?
- Or a softboi / fuckboi?
- Could you be a tatted badboy?
- Are you street smart?
- Maybe you’re a goth / emo guy?
- Working out to a be jacked, six-pack Asian is tried and true.
- Or a dancer / DJ like Matt “Dumbo” Nguyen?
- And so much more!
YOU are not limited in how you choose to express your Asian Masculine Identity. You just need to choose WHICH and HOW you choose to express your Sexual Archetype. Many of us are not aware of them because of the social conditioning.
And as I mentioned above, a lot of Asian men try to dodge their identity through so many different ways. This is a horrible way to try to appear more attractive. Why? Because not owning your identity and trying to hide it reeks of of insecurity. And women can see right through the act and will find out sooner or later.
You don’t need to “look” or “act” like a White boi in order to attract women. Be proud of being an Asian man because of the inherent power in yourself and your identity. Like I always so, be successful BECAUSE you’re an Asian man and NOT in spite of being Asian.
So choosing WHO you want to be is the first step and then when you’re ready, I help my students learn HOW to express their powers of sexual attraction so Asian men can date White women.
2) Direct Approach To Destroy Stereotypes
Sexual attraction is part evolutionary biology and part societal conditioning. What that means is that women will make heuristic decisions on their romantic partner. Heuristics is a general cognitive framework where we humans will make complex decisions in a quick, efficient manner based on the available information at hand.
What that means in terms of dating White women for Asian men, is that she will have both an inherent, visceral reaction on a physical level to your presence. AND she will unconsciously draw upon her “Dating iCloud” in order to make an unconscious judgement on how attracted she will be to you.
In other words, if you approach her dressed and acting like a homeless person, she’s going to TREAT you like a homeless person.
And if you approach her as an Asian male, then that White female will judge you based off of a combination of your physical presence, your style, your body language, and your approach AND whatever Hollywood stereotypes she might have been unconsciously taught. And that’s why you not only need that Asian Male Sexual Identity to project your identity, but also a strong Direct Approach to BREAK any heuristic judgement patterns she MIGHT have.
A direct approach is when you approach a woman and express your romantic intentions right away. You do have to calibrate to the situation as sometimes a direct approach might not make sense. like trying to pick up a woman at the gym. But your intent is to create that magic movie moment from all those romcom movies where time slows down, the music starts to swell, and the leading man sweeps the beautiful romantic interest off her feet.
That’s the power of a Direct Approach. It OBLITERATES any Asian stereotypes and preconceptions she might have and then YOU fill in the void with the overpowering charm of your Asian Male Sexual Archetype.
And that’s how an Asian man can date any White woman he desires.
By Conquering Yourself, You’ll “Conquer” Women Of All Races
It is completely within the world of possibility for an Indian, Vietnamese, Korean or Chinese guy to date White women. You first have to believe that it’s possible in the first place whether that’s facing off against Hollywood stereotypes or internalized racism.
There’s no reason to let the mainstream media make you feel unattractive. You don’t have to be limited to dating only Asian women, which just gives you a les than 1% chance of finding a girlfriend. If anything, you can use that to strengthen your resolve and galvanize your determination.
You can use that to become stronger in both a physical and mental sense. By embarking upon the life long journey of your own self-improvement and Game, you’ll be a successful Asian male dating White females (or any race for that matter).
There’s no limit to what you can achieve as long as you put your mind to it. As long as you take action. As long as you have coaches (like myself and my team) who will hold you accountable and teach you the right skillset. And who can help you with your mindset.
Become one of the Asian men who date White Women (AMWF). Defeat the sexual racial hierarchy, gain confidence in yourself, get yourself a girlfriend and maybe meet your future love of your life, wife, and mother of your children.
So if you want to learn more, make sure to check out my other articles or check out our live training page and see if you’re ready to level up to Asian Sex Symbol status like your predecessors have.
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